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Obama opens lemonade stand, hopes to counter Romney's executive experience jabs
6/4/2012 10:00 AM Matt Rock
Visiting Washington DC this week? Why not stop by 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue to try some lemonade, made by the President of the United States and his two daughters? That's what President Barack Obama is hoping you'll do, as he sets another record as the nation's first president to host a lemonade stand on the grounds of the White House.
“Mitt Romney keeps claiming I don't have executive experience. Like being the head of the executive branch of government for nearly four years, and being in the Senate before that, doesn't count for much,” said President Obama, while announcing the lemonade stand. “So I figured I would open a lemonade stand, right on the sidewalk in front of the White House.”
White House Press Secretary Jay Carney later explained to the press that President Obama is hoping to set prices at $1 for a Dixie cup, $2.50 for cupcakes, and $5 for a large commemorative glass, with the proceeds going to his already-impressive campaign fund.
However, Congress is reportedly expecting to intervene, demanding the President make his lemonade stand's products free for the top 1% of wage earners, while also insisting the President only serve American citizens with four or more forms of valid ID. They're also demanding that Planned Parenthood not see any of the proceeds, and that Obama should deny service to any woman that has ever had, or might have in the future, an abortion, or a child out of wedlock.
Meanwhile, Mitt Romney has refused to comment on the president's announcement, though several sources inside the Romney campaign have confirmed to PTP that the former Massachusetts governor is considering a hostile majority buyout of Jamba Juice to prove that his executive experience is even better. - Return to Previous Page
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