Pardon The Pundit News Feed
GOP figures lash out against Betty White, labels her “socialist,” “domestic terrorist”
5/12/2012 3:15 PM Matt Rock -
Hollywood starlet Betty White is under fire today by the GOP and the Tea Party after the 90-year old actress recently endorsed President Obama, the first such endorsement she's ever made. Conservatives are saying that White, who told the Associated Press that she always avoided politics because she didn't want to upset any of her fans and that she's very bi-partisan, is a socialist, a Chinese spy, and “most likely also a terrorist,” as Allen West of Florida put it.
“That does it. I'm done trusting Hollywood stars,” said House Speaker John Boehner of White's recent endorsement, tears flowing in true trademarked fashion. “Every time I start to think I'm becoming someone's fan, they reveal that they're an evil, Godless liberal like this. You know, I was half-way through season three of `ER' on DVD before George Clooney held his `I hate America' fundraiser dinner... a dinner to which I wasn't invited. Screw Hollywood! Screw Betty White!”
“I think it's a bit strange that Betty White has come out in favor of Obama all of the sudden,” said Glenn Beck, during his radio show that no one listens to anymore. “I'm not saying she's a prostitute, I would never say that, but I'd like to follow the money a bit. Did Barack Obama pay Betty White and abuse the power of the Oval Office to give Betty White a huge comeback, all so she'd endorse him several months before an election he was surely going to lose to Mitt Romney otherwise? It seems fishy to me, that's all I'm saying.”
House Majority Leader Eric Cantor offered a different view of the situation. “I'm not surprised another Hollywood star has gone to Obama. They're his sort of people. And it's not like Republicans don't have celebrities! We've got... uh... Chuck Norris, and Ted Nugent, that blonde lady from `SNL' whose name no one can ever remember, and probably more stars. You might call them washed-up has-beens, but I call them American patriots! So take that, Hollywood elites!” - Return to Previous Page
|
|
|
|
ARCHIVES
ADVERTISING - COMEDY AT THE ARLINGTON DRAFTHOUSE
Cool Cow Comedy Showcase in The Green Room - ONLY $10 (Featuring Ryan Conner)
 Jay Pharoah from Saturday Night Live at the Arlington Drafthouse
 Steve Lemme and Kevin Heffernan from Super Troopers and Beerfest
 Cinematic Titanic (Creators of Mystery Science Theater) LIVE at the Arlington Drafthouse
 Porkchop Volcano - Live Short Form Improv Comedy in The Green Room - FREE ADMISSION
 Matt Braunger from Letterman, The Tonight Show and MADtv at the Arlington Drafthouse
 Neal Brennan Co-Creator of Chappelle’s Show at the Arlington Drafthouse


Powered By Hypertext Media© PardonThePundit - ABOUT | JOIN | TERMS
Pardon The Pundit is a political satire publication that parodies the news and creates fake news. None of our postings should be regarded as truthful,
and none of our references of an individual seeks to inflict malice or emotional harm. We are just ridiculous.
|