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Romney campaign attacks Obama after Will Smith slaps reporter
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5/19/2012 3:46 PM Matt Rock - Mitt Romney's campaign has gone into attack mode today, defending a male Russian reporter that was slapped by Hollywood superstar Will Smith after he attempted to kiss the “Men In Black” star on the mouth. Team Romney claims that Smith, who recently said that he believes he should pay more in taxes and is rumored to be planning a starring role in a future biopic about President Obama's 2008 election, may have been acting on the orders of the White House.

“Let me get this straight. Obama pals around with a guy that slapped a reporter in the mouth for doing something gay, but Obama wants us to believe he supports gay rights? What a crock,” said Romney Campaign Manager Matt Rhoades. “Obviously the Fresh Prince isn't down with gay marriage. He's met President Obama, possibly more than once. Therefore, Obama isn't down with gay marriage, either!”

Rhoades also believes Smith may have been acting on orders from Obama, or possibly fellow movie star George Clooney, whom Rhoades believes may be the President's Field Commander for Hollywood stars.

“We all know Obama hates freedom,” Rhoades continued. “Will Smith serving as the long arm of the White House, ruthlessly beating on helpless journalists... it's almost like Obama has never even read the Constitution. It's called the first amendment, Obama... give it a read sometime! It explicitly states that Hollywood stars that endorse you aren't allowed to slap reporters that try to kiss them in foreign countries!”

“If a male reporter tried to kiss Mitt Romney on the mouth, this would have turned out very differently,” Rhoades offered, in closing. “Mitt would have held him down, shaved his hair, called him a series of derogatory names, stuffed him into a dog carrier, strapped him to the roof of a car, driven him out to Marcus Bachmann's gay conversion therapy clinic, and then called his parents on behalf of Mormon space Jesus to tell them they did a crappy job raising their son, and that he made a terrible choice in being gay. But slap them? No way! That's bigotry!”
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