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President Obama carries out stealth mission to steal Mitt Romney's magic underpants
5/21/2012 11:01 AM Matt Rock -
President Obama was joined by SEAL Team Six early this morning in a covert operation to break into the hotel of GOP rival Mitt Romney. The White House confirms that their mission has been a success: President Obama has stolen Mitt Romney's magic Mormon underwear, and is now safely back at Camp David with G8 leaders.
The President decided to steal Romney's underwear as a prank, plotting out an elaborate operation inside the unidentified hotel where Romney and his strange-looking children were staying, after Vice President Joe Biden reportedly asked the President privately if perhaps Romney's Mormon underwear, which allegedly has magical properties, could be being used by Romney to help inflate his polling numbers, even though 99.9% of the American populace think Mitt Romney is a tool.
“President Obama came up with this plan on his own. Others were opposed to it, but it was ultimately his call,” said White House Press Secretary Jay Carney. “He personally joined SEAL Team Six on the panty raid, and the team escaped with zero casualties or injuries. They took no fewer than six pairs of Mr. Romney's underpants.”
However, the pundits at “Fox and Friends” offer a different take on the raid. “I don't believe for one second that Obama had anything to do with this raid,” claimed Steve Doocy this morning. “I saw the picture of him onboard Marine One, but that looks staged to me. And there was a witness in the hotel that said he was shot in the neck by President Barack Obama with a tranquilizer gun, but he's probably a paid actor. This is just another example of Obama trying to take credit from our brave men and women in uniform!” - Return to Previous Page
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