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Gay marriage polling shifts; some numbers obscured by glitter
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5/24/2012 8:37 PM Matt Rock - A new PTP/ CNN/ ABC/ XYZ/ NIN/ KFC poll shows that Americans are shifting in their opinions of gay marriage in the wake of President Obama's highly-publicized coming-out (in support) speech. 57% of likely voters say they support gay marriage, a result that mirrors a recent poll in Maryland, one that's less made up than ours, that shows their State also supports gay marriage equality to the tune of 57%.

The results of our poll show that President Obama's endorsement of marriage equality played a key role in the new shift. 48% of those who answered they support gay marriage said that President Obama changed their view, while 14% said that Mitt Romney managed to make them pro-gay marriage just by commenting on it, and the remainder all asked how many questions are on this stupid poll, anyway.

When asked how much they support gay marriage, only 34% said “fully.” 51% responded with “mostly,” while 8% said “only a little.” 4% said “barely,” while the smallest majority was at the other end of the spectrum, with 3% saying “enough that I'd allow Andy Dick to sleep on my sofa.”

Opponents of gay marriage have found the polling data particularly troubling. “I can't believe the American people got bamboozled into supporting gay marriage by Obama!” said Edgar Reid of North Carolina. “I realize that every time we say the reasons why we're against gay marriage, most Americans roll their eyes, sigh, and walk away. But that's because they know we're right! If we allow gays to get married, we'll... uh... America will... err... crap! Make that 58%. I just realized how stupid I sounded, dang it!”
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