Pardon The Pundit Home
news RSS Feed Twitter
HomeNewsNotesAboutJoin UsYouTube VideosFacebookDrafthouse
Pardon The Pundit News Feed
Romney refuses to distance himself from Trump
Facebook Facebook Facebook Facebook Facebook Facebook
5/30/2012 8:30 PM Floyd Harden - Mitt Romney yesterday defended his campaign’s relationship with billionaire turned TV reality star Donald Trump, despite the increasingly bizarre allegations being leveled at President Obama by Trump. Shortly after the Donald accused the President of being a Kenyan vampire who worships a cheese danish and secretly owns a string of laundromats in predominantly gay neighborhoods, Romney sat down for an interview with PTP to defend his Republican supporter.

PTP: Thanks for joining us, Governor Romney.

Romney: No need to be so formal. Call me by my first name: President.

PTP: But you’re not the -

Romney: And by the way, did you know that on my first day in office, I’ll repeal Obamacare, end unemployment and bring Adolph Hitler to justice?

PTP: Sir, Hitler is dead.

Romney: Obama! Dammit, I hate that grandstanding bastard!

PTP: I wanted to ask you about Donald Trump. How do you justify your relationship with a man who accuses the President of being a vampire?

Romney: Which President? President Romney or that show-off in the White House?

PTP: Obama.

Romney: Obama? A vampire?! Well he just lost my vote!

PTP: Sir?

Romney: Look, I can’t help it if Donald Trump caters to a fringe of the Republican Party that still believes I can get elected. The point is the man is as wealthy as he is rich. Besides, Donald Trump and I have a lot in common. We both had ourselves incorporated in order to legally become “people” and we both have irrefutable proof that Obama invented anthrax.

PTP: You really believe that, sir?

Romney: How should I know what I believe?! I’m sick of your gotcha questions!

PTP: Sorry, sir. Can you at least tell me if your association with Trump has led you to consider him for a position in a Romney administration?

Romney: Sure! Trump’s going to be my Secretary of Money.

PTP: You mean Treasury Secretary?

Romney: Nope. I’m putting him in charge of my new Department of Money. He’ll spend his days surrounded by sweet, sweet cash. I tell you what, I envy the guy. He’ll be doing what he does best while I’ll be, well, I’ll be President - Reagan willing, of course.
 - Return to Previous Page
PARDON THE PUNDIT TOURING COMPANY LIVE

Showcase - 6 Cast Members (Stand-Up, Improv, Sketch) 75 mins
Feb 24th & 25th 7:30PM/9:45PM at Harman Center for the Arts Downtown DC - $20

Comedy Caucus - 3 Cast Members (Stand-Up) 50 mins
Monday Feb 13th 8PM at Corner Store Arts Capitol Hill - $10


ADVERTISING - COMEDY AT THE ARLINGTON DRAFTHOUSE

Cool Cow Comedy Showcase in The Green Room - ONLY $10 (Featuring Ryan Conner)
Cool Cow Comedy Showcase in The Green Room - ONLY $10 (Featuring Ryan Conner)

Jay Pharoah from Saturday Night Live at the Arlington Drafthouse
Jay Pharoah from Saturday Night Live at the Arlington Drafthouse

Steve Lemme and Kevin Heffernan from Super Troopers and Beerfest
Steve Lemme and Kevin Heffernan from Super Troopers and Beerfest

Cinematic Titanic (Creators of Mystery Science Theater) LIVE at the Arlington Drafthouse
Cinematic Titanic (Creators of Mystery Science Theater) LIVE at the Arlington Drafthouse

Porkchop Volcano - Live Short Form Improv Comedy in The Green Room - FREE ADMISSION
Porkchop Volcano - Live Short Form Improv Comedy in The Green Room - FREE ADMISSION

Matt Braunger from Letterman, The Tonight Show and MADtv at the Arlington Drafthouse
Matt Braunger from Letterman, The Tonight Show and MADtv at the Arlington Drafthouse

Neal Brennan Co-Creator of Chappelle’s Show at the Arlington Drafthouse
Neal Brennan Co-Creator of Chappelle’s Show at the Arlington Drafthouse




Powered By Hypertext Media
© PardonThePundit - ABOUT | JOIN | TERMS

Pardon The Pundit is a political satire publication that parodies the news and creates fake news. None of our postings should be regarded as truthful, and none of our references of an individual seeks to inflict malice or emotional harm. We are just ridiculous.