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Palin denies domestic terrorism ties, aims assault rifle at reporters
6/4/2012 8:17 PM Matt Rock
Sarah Palin is being hunted by authorities today after the former half-term Governor allegedly – well, we were there, so “literally” – aimed an assault rifle at reporters from PTP, CNN, and MSNBC, after PTP's Floyd Harden asked Palin if she “pals around with terrorists.”
On Thursday, a federal court in Alaska heard sworn testimony that two close friends of Sarah Palin's introduced a radical Alaska militant to an FBI informant. The militant, who belonged to a group called the “Alaska Peacekeeper Militia,” was working with others on a plan to kidnap and assassinate judges in Alaska, as well as some law enforcement officials.
Harden was accompanied with two PTP interns, as well as teams from CNN and MSNBC, who traveled via dogsled to the Palin residence. They left on Thursday, but didn't arrive until today, because Alaska doesn't have, you know, roads.
“Pseudo-Governor Palin, would it be fair to ask if you `pal around with terrorists,' in light of the recent revelation that you, well, pal around with terrorists?” asked Harden. Palin refused to respond, apparently nervous as she walked over to a cabinet on the far side of the room. “Mrs. Palin? Terrorists? Do you pal around with them? Can you see domestic terror from your porch? Are those the `real Americans' you kept talking about? Mrs. Palin? Anybody home?”
With this, Palin proceeded to pull out an M16 assault rifle, aiming it directly at Harden. Luckily, Floyd's impressive improv skills afforded him an escape, as he pretended to become a wolf, knowing that Palin didn't have a helicopter to shoot him from.
Two CNN reporters were shot, but even CNN stated they didn't know what their names were, because hey, it's CNN. Unless it's Soledad O'Brien or Anderson Cooper, who cares? - Return to Previous Page
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