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Mitt Romney promises to grow the federal government, says Obama isn't doing it well
6/9/2012 3:40 PM Matt Rock -
Hot off the heels of Mitt Romney's comments yesterday that America doesn't need more firefighters, police officers, or teachers, the presidential candidate and former Massachusetts Governor decided to flip-flop his position today, promising to grow the size of the federal government more than any other President in history, all while managing to contradict himself and blast the public sector.
“Obama wants to turn everyone in America into a public-sector worker,” Romney claimed, while speaking to a crowd of supporters. “He's all about big government. The funny thing is, though, he's terrible at it, because his administration has cut more public sector jobs than anyone in recent history. Why does Obama hate public sector workers so much?”
“You wouldn't see that in a Mitt Romney presidency. I'll grow the public sector by at least 30% in my first term. Ronald Reagan grew the public sector. George H.W. Bush and George W. Bush, both of them, added public sector jobs. I'll add more government jobs than all three of those great American heroes combined!”
Romney paused as the audience roared in applause. “Democrats are terrible at growing the federal government. They `claim' they're all about big government, but where's their track record? Bill Clinton did `okay,' but his public sector job growth was nothing compared to what you can expect from my first term as your President!”
After more cheers of support, Romney concluded his speech. “The era of Democrats and their big government is over! I'll push States to fire policemen, firefighters, teachers, and other public workers. Let the private sector handle that! Anything less would be socialist! I'll cut public sector jobs, just like Ronald Reagan, George H.W. Bush, and George W. Bush did, and you're all American voters, so I know that your attention span means that you don't remember anything I said earlier in this speech! APPLE PIE! FUNYUNS! FREEDOM! AMERICA!” - Return to Previous Page
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