Pardon The Pundit News Feed
Tampa to world; we're fun, too!
7/15/2012 7:05 AM Marla Jameson
After hearing of the North Carolina law making it legal to sell hard alcohol on Labor Day, Tampa's mayor, Bob Buckhorn, announced that his city is "much more fun than Charlotte" and insisted that the Republicans attending this year's GOP convention will have "a much better time than those Democrats in North Carolina." Does the mayor have any hard evidence to back such claims up? He sure does! The city's strip clubs are adding staff and bringing some in from other parts of the country.
"According to a Better Business Bureau report from a few years back, we rank as third among North American cities in terms of number of strip clubs per capita, and our strippers are pretty amazing," Buckhorn told reporters. "And it was already legal to buy hard alcohol here. We didn't need to pass some new law to make that OK. We know how politics is done around here. We are experts on elections, us Floridians."
Some labor unions were quick to respond to the mayor's statements about the strippers coming into the city. "Where are these strippers coming from? Other parts of America, we hope. This country cannot afford to outsource good stripping jobs to other countries," said United Strippers of America spokeswoman Jamie Jennings. "We haven't been contacted by anyone at the RNC or the city. We are more than willing to meet with them and talk about getting our friends to come down to Florida, but if we hear they bringing 'em in from China or the Philippines, we're going on strike. You know one thing you don't want plastered on every paper and leading every newscast? Aging strippers marching in the 100 degree plus heat. That's what."
No one from the Democratic Party would return our calls about the subject, but one consultant familiar with their thinking told us, "They're not gonna touch that with a ten foot pole, can you blame them? No one can." - Return to Previous Page
ADVERTISING - COMEDY AT THE ARLINGTON DRAFTHOUSE
Cool Cow Comedy Showcase in The Green Room - ONLY $10 (Featuring Ryan Conner)
Jay Pharoah from Saturday Night Live at the Arlington Drafthouse
Steve Lemme and Kevin Heffernan from Super Troopers and Beerfest
Cinematic Titanic (Creators of Mystery Science Theater) LIVE at the Arlington Drafthouse
Porkchop Volcano - Live Short Form Improv Comedy in The Green Room - FREE ADMISSION
Matt Braunger from Letterman, The Tonight Show and MADtv at the Arlington Drafthouse
Neal Brennan Co-Creator of Chappelle’s Show at the Arlington Drafthouse
Powered By Hypertext Media
© PardonThePundit - ABOUT
Pardon The Pundit is a political satire publication that parodies the news and creates fake news. None of our postings should be regarded as truthful,
and none of our references of an individual seeks to inflict malice or emotional harm. We are just ridiculous.