Pardon The Pundit News Feed
Congress’ opinion of Americans at all time low
10/5/2011 8:30 PM Floyd Harden -
A new Pardon The Pundit poll has revealed a startling fact: Congress hates the American people just as much as the American people hate Congress. The poll, which was conducted last week, puts Congress’ approval rating of the American people at a paltry 13% - exactly the same rating that Americans give Congress.
Congressmen and women gave several reasons for their low opinions of Americans.
House Majority Leader Eric Cantor said he hates Americans “because they’re idiots if they think I’m going to do what’s right for the country when I came here to make a difference in the lives of people who really matter, me.”
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid was less circumspect in his opinion of Americans. “We should just throw all those bums out and get some new Americans in there who will elect a Congress that will put the interests of this new batch of Americans ahead of the interests of that other, crappier batch of Americans whom we should just throw out. Bums, I tell you!”
Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell expressed his disgust with the American people by disagreeing with Harry Reid. “Whatever Reid said, I’m against it! Now, regarding my opinion of the American people, Reid sucks!”
Nancy Pelosi, who PTP was surprised to learn still exists, was one of the few who thinks the American people are doing a good job. “Let’s be fair. Americans aren’t the brightest bunch ever to come down the pipe, but they do have one thing going for them. They hate Congress.” - Return to Previous Page
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