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Gingrich abandons Presidential bid for a younger, healthier campaign
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2/2/2012 3:05 PM Brian Vincenzo - Following a double-digit loss in the Florida primary, Newt Gingrich was dealt the devastating news that his campaign’s health was floundering. With a low delegate count, it would have been a long battle with debilitating poll numbers to get the campaign back to its South Carolina vitality. Two hours later, while his campaign staff sulked and tried to cope with this devastation, Gingrich reportedly announced that he was leaving them.

“Newt came rushing into the office, sweating and carrying a bunch of empty duffle bags,” said RC Hammond, Spokesman for the Gingrich Campaign. “At first we thought he was just going to pull Romney signs out of people’s lawns, you know, normal campaign stuff. But then he starts emptying his desk into the bags... his talking points, the miniature moon-colony model, all of it. He swore it had nothing to do with the campaign’s health, but we knew the deal.”

That night, Gingrich visited the Romney Campaign headquarters, which is located in the cosmetics section of a Macy’s in Boca Raton. According to Romney aides, the free samples have cut operating costs by $1.3 million per month. In an unprecedented maneuver, Gingrich paired up with Romney 2012 only hours after leaving his campaign in their hour of need, the coffee still warm in the break room. The Romney-Gingrich ticket lasted only a short while before an ugly split. According to Romney Campaign Manager Matt Rhoades, “Newt suggested that we run an ‘open’ campaign, allowing him to campaign for us mostly, but also for other candidates sometimes, in order to ‘spice things up’. We weren’t into it.”

The next morning, we caught up with Gingrich leaving his hotel room, and asked him to comment on whether this pattern called his loyalty into question. He seemed visibly frustrated with the question, and replied, “How can I stay tied down to some old, struggling campaign when I’m trying to win the trust of Americans as a whole? I’m too loyal for that.” Gingrich then got into a BMW driven by young Republican Senator Marco Rubio, and sped off.
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