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GOP candidates planning mean April Fool's prank on Ron Paul
3/24/2012 8:05 PM Matt Rock
Reports are surfacing today that Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, and Newt Gingrich are planning a foul, diabolical prank for April Fool's Day this year, with the target of their hijinx being their GOP primary rival, Texas Congressman Ron Paul. Sources in all three camps claim that the candidates have been planning the prank via email and phone calls for at least four days as of this publishing.
“All three candidates will have their offices leak this week that they're dropping out of the race, and that they'll all be holding simultaneous press conferences just before noon on April 1st to make their formal announcements,” said one of our anonymous sources. “It'll make Ron Paul and his cult think he's winning by default, and they'll get all excited, just to hear `April Fool's!' on Sunday. Pretty foul, isn't it?”
However, rumors are already spreading that all three prankster candidates might be second-guessing the plan. Some claim that Newt Gingrich may preemptively announce that any candidate that says “April Fool's” will be dropping out of the race, taking away the right for backsies. Mitt Romney might take that opportunity to get in his weekly speaking gaffe, rather than playing along with the game. And Rick Santorum might not join in, because it's Sunday, and he usually doesn't get out of Church until 7 or 8 in the evening.
We went to a random guy on the street wearing a “Ron Paul 2012” T-shirt, to get his take on the prank. “It's a conspiracy! A conspiracy I tell you! Ron Paul, our Lord, Grace and majesty be upon him as he guideth us to the unicorn tram that will taketh us to the spaceth shipeth, has been robbed of every single Primary and Caucus so far by the GOP machine that wants him to fail, and wants to keep Obama in the White House another four years! They can't let a candidate like Ron Paul, praise be unto him, may his countenance shine down on our souls from the planet from which he hails, so we may bask in the glory of his Kool Aid, amen, win an election!” - Return to Previous Page
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