Pardon The Pundit News Feed
Palin, Rubio, Ryan, and West compete to be Romney's running mate
4/7/2012 4:10 PM Matt Rock -
With the GOP primary starting to wind down, it has become obvious to most – well, for some of us, it's been obvious for a long time now – that Mitt Romney is going to win the nomination, and will face off in the General election against President Obama, a race he'll most likely subsequently lose after making more ridiculously out-of-touch comments that only appeal to excessively wealthy people. But one question is on everyone's mind: who will Romney pick to be his running mate?
“It's probably down to Mark Rubio or Paul Ryan,” said one anonymous Romney campaign staffer. “Chances are it'll be Ryan, because then, the campaign will have an out-of-touch rich white guy whose bad at math, and also Mitt Romney. Allen West is also a name getting tossed around the office, though he's pretty annoying, even if you agree with the stuff he says.”
But Sarah Palin warns that you shouldn't discount her. “You know, I think I'm gonna get it, you betcha!” said Palin, during a recent TV interview that no one at PTP could be bothered to watch. “Mitt Romney realizes I'm a true, honest-to-God hockey mom, and his campaign needs that mavericky spirit that we have in the great State of Alaska. If only John McCain would have let me be on top of that ticket, we would have gone all the way, don't-cha-know.”
Meanwhile, our anonymous source in the Romney campaign explains that the candidate himself has made his top VP pick resoundingly clear, and has been trying to pull his campaign staff in one direction. “Mr. Romney keeps pointing at a stack of cash with a wink and a nod. He says the Vice President doesn't really do anything, except break ties, and what breaks a tie better than buying off the other side? So yeah, he really wants a big stack of money to be his VP.” - Return to Previous Page
|
|
|
|
ARCHIVES
ADVERTISING - COMEDY AT THE ARLINGTON DRAFTHOUSE
Cool Cow Comedy Showcase in The Green Room - ONLY $10 (Featuring Ryan Conner)
 Jay Pharoah from Saturday Night Live at the Arlington Drafthouse
 Steve Lemme and Kevin Heffernan from Super Troopers and Beerfest
 Cinematic Titanic (Creators of Mystery Science Theater) LIVE at the Arlington Drafthouse
 Porkchop Volcano - Live Short Form Improv Comedy in The Green Room - FREE ADMISSION
 Matt Braunger from Letterman, The Tonight Show and MADtv at the Arlington Drafthouse
 Neal Brennan Co-Creator of Chappelle’s Show at the Arlington Drafthouse


Powered By Hypertext Media© PardonThePundit - ABOUT | JOIN | TERMS
Pardon The Pundit is a political satire publication that parodies the news and creates fake news. None of our postings should be regarded as truthful,
and none of our references of an individual seeks to inflict malice or emotional harm. We are just ridiculous.
|