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Mitt Romney appears at “420” event, thought it was a Tea Party tax code summit
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4/20/2012 8:24 PM Matt Rock - Presumptive GOP nominee Mitt Romney showed up to a college “420 event” in Colorado today, apparently unaware that April 20th (“420”) is celebrated by marijuana users as “weed day,” a national holiday that is condemned by the government, beloved by stoners, and has been celebrated in song, film, books, and even California's medical marijuana legislation (“SB 420”).

Romney believed “420” was a summit hosted by the Tea party where the numbers 4, 2, and 0 were newly-proposed tax rates; a 4% sales tax, a 2% capital gains tax, and a 0% income tax. And when the former Massachusetts Governor spoke to the crowd assembled before him, he had no idea just how poignant, and decidedly “crunchy,” his words would be to the four-hundred and twenty stoners in attendance, each of whom had been invited.

“Let me start out by saying that I wholeheartedly support your cause, and I very much hope that your ultimate objective here is reached today,” Romney offered, taking the stage without realizing he was standing beside a 6-foot rainbow-colored bong, while Pink Floyd's “Dark Side of the Moon” played, and with “The Wizard of Oz” being projected onto a large screen behind him. “The government wants to control all of our lives. I think it's about time we told them to take a hike!”

The audience cheered, applauding with orange-stained hands from all of the cheese puffs they were eating, before Romney continued. “I see a sign in the audience that reads `legalize it.' I agree! We don't need the government regulating what we can or can not do in the private sector. We should legalize it... legalize all of it! Oh, thank you, I would love a brownie! And don't let the government tell you the ladder to success is too high. There is no such thing as `too high!'”

The audience roared with applause, though witnesses say they only really heard “no such thing as too high” over the bubbly sounds of their bongs. Romney himself has not yet commented on the ordeal. He was last seen barking at the moon and ordering his campaign staff to bring him “all the beef jerky in the land.”
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