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Secret Service scandal expands to involve mailmen, grandmother, newspaper boy
4/23/2012 10:02 AM Matt Rock
Numerous investigations into alleged misconduct involving prostitutes by the US Secret Service ahead of President Obama's trip to Colombia recently have resulted in countless resignations and firings, and as the scandal expands, some very unlikely players have emerged, having been involved in the scandal in key ways that no one could have ever predicted.
“To date, six out of the accused eleven have left, and our investigation has spread much broader than we'd anticipated it would,” said Secret Service Director Mark J. Sullivan, who dresses up like a ninja the day “after” Halloween. “The results of all this have been pretty staggering. None of us could have predicted just how deep the rabbit hole would go.”
The scandal's investigations have recently expanded to include a plumber, whose brother had traveled to Colombia and experienced the whore house, and told his friend, a restaurant employee in Washington DC, about their services. This employee then transmitted the message to a Secret Service agent who was a part of the Colombian advance team.
And according to Sullivan, the list of key players in the scandal keeps growing. “I can't really comment on an open investigation too much. I can just tell you that this thing is spiraling out of control now. Three mailmen, a Travelocity customer service representative, two homeless people, a grandmother with seven grandchildren, Andy Dick, two employees at Wikipedia, an Air Traffic Controller, a newspaper delivery boy, four Girl Scouts, a cat named `Snugglebear,' an Olympic bronze medalist... I'll bet several of your readers over at PTP are about to get called up to a Congressional hearing any day now!” - Return to Previous Page
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